Macabre - What the Heck Richard Speck (Eight Nurses You Wrecked) (2:06-ish)

You like cool music dontcha? Listen to this, you're guaranteed to be down with the kids. Since this is Macabre it's going to be about a serial killer because that's all they ever write about. A Macabre song that isn't about serial killers is like a Mortician song without a movie sample, it just doesn't get done. There's blasting all over this which always gets heads banging and then there's that quite original vocal style from Corporate Death which is always good for a laugh. (1:24) A lead, and then more blasting. If you're sick to death of blasting I'm sure that you can still make a little room for Macabre because they are cool.

I'm certainly in the mood for writing today.

Crom - Funeral Pyre (0:50-ish)

It's a cover of (part of) Black Funeral by Mercyful Fate but with one of the words changed (0:25) which I'm having trouble discerning because maybe my hearing is shit? Along with Nasty Ronnie destroying televisions, Wendy O. Williams chainsawing guitars in half and blowing up cars and Tim Baker being wheeled on stage in a coffin to burst out and sing King Of the Dead this is pretty metal.

Judas Priest - Ram It Down (4:49-ish)

It's a far cry from the best Priest album and definitely not the best song on there (hello Blood Red Skies and Monsters Of Rock). I can have some pretty terrible taste in music sometimes. It's well played at least and starts so promisingly with a scream from Rob. (0:21) First lead here and it's into the singing (0:32). The bridge (0:45) is typical Priest ridiculousness; thousands of cars and a million guitars... that's a lot of cars and a pretty huge army of rock. I could believe Queen pulling those numbers but not Priest. (1:20) Another lead here and the bridge and chorus again (1:39), time to rage metal maniacs. (1:48) A  minute lead here, during the chorus and one of Rob's screams here (2:09). (2:21) Here you get two lines which are supposed to be unifying but it comes off as a bit fake but what do you expect when the album you did before was Turbo. Painkiller wasn't on the horizon just yet. At least the minute and twenty one of solos (2:36-3:57) which end in another scream are good. (4:03) The last bridge and chorus with little (4:29 ) leads (4:35) added in there and it ends with a dual-tracked (4:43) scream which always leaves me puzzled how any band can pull it off live.

I've been a bit negative. Maybe I should've wrote about Victim Of Changes instead.

King Diamond - No Presents For Christmas (4:21-ish)

I'm sure that there is some kind of heavy metal law that requires you to post that image whenever you write about this song.

It's a classic and you know it. It may start out with some jingling bells but it's not long before you get one of King's instantly recognisable laughs (0:18) and the first riff kicks it off into a typical Andy La Rocque lead (0:31). (0:50) Vocals start here. You'd think that the song would be more evil and vengeful being a King Diamond song but it's pretty tame and completely silly, you'll have to hit up Google and search around for the lyrics because it's a scream. (1:01) Speaking of screams... (1:59) Have another one, AAIIIEEEE! (2:33-2:49) What you get here is two killer solos here broken up with some more bells and then more shredding from Michael and Andy (2:55-3:23). This is guitar hero shit here folks. (3:42) Here is that ridiculous Christmas riff where the guitar sounds like something they put on the boombox at the holiday inn when you're there at this time of year. Oh hey, it ends with a laugh as well (4:12).

This is a song that I would have loved them to have made a video of.

Nasty Savage - Metal Knights (2:42-ish)

Nasty Savage were fucking cool. Metal Knights may be a silly song but that just makes it a riot to thrash out to. It's about killing posers, don't start hating on songs about killing posers. It starts out with the riff that dominates the song and it's not long before Nasty Ronnie starts his crazed performance (0:10). I could listen to him all day. If you haven't heard Ronnie sing you could compare him to King Diamond but that's not really all that accurate. Tough luck if you haven't heard King either because that's all I got. (0:20) Chorus, where we are told that the metal knights live on and all of the posers will die. (0:44) More vocals and the chorus repeated (0:55) and then it's into a totally shredding solo (1:06). But that's not enough, they hit us with another one (1:26) and then one more if we didn't get the message the first two times (1:38). Boy they're just outta control, thrash! (1:48) Oh it's over, I was totally absorbed. (1:58) This is where you can expect the last verse and the final chorus (2:08). It was a blur while it lasted.

Wage of mayhem.

Omen - Ruby Eyes (Of the Serpent) (3:51-ish)

Some squealing guitars open this one then it's into a typical Omen riff (0:12). (0:47) This is where the vocals start. I love J. D. Kimball's vocals, full of warrior pride and sadness which makes him much more believable than a huge number of those other vocalists doing this type of thing. Oh look, a lead (1:49) which goes right into a solo (2:01) and then another one (2:24). That's another thing I like about Omen. Well, everything but the solos really stick in the mind. (2:43) Vocals again, repeating the bridge and chorus and there's that riff at the start again (3:13). If you aren't into this band then you really suck and you're going to have to come to terms with that.

Gotham City - Battle Blade @ 33 ⅓ (6:07-ish)

Something a bit different today. You've got to slow this down just to hear how funeral it sounds. Raise the pitch a little if the vocals don't do it for you. What's best to use? I don't know, use Audacity or something. This makes it the best song off of The Unknown because it's the only one that works when slowed down.

Massive riff at the start. (0:59) Vocals come in and boy they sound funny at such a slow speed but I like 'em anyway. (2:12) Really mournful lead and then more of those vocals (2:20). (3:00-3:06) Short lead here. (3:3:53) This is where the beat changes and the solo starts (4:06) which is a very good solo. (2:56) Last vocals here, if this was at the original speed it's well fast and the part of the song that I like the most 'cause it's great to sing along to.

I think I'll write about more songs slowed down because it makes them heavier. Amusingly, if you raise the pitch high enough it starts to sound like Cirith Ungol. Awesome.